How to read a Shopping List: List Two, Part Two
By Budiak
The first three items to go in the shredder are 'Paper Plates, Cheese Stix, and Tuna'. Let's examine the text, and then discuss.
Item One: Paper Plates
Right off the bat this list looks somewhat like a list that might be for a party, or perhaps gearing up for a party that might be in a few weeks. If the writing weren't in sloppy cursive on such hip stationary I'd say that this list might belong to a slovenly bachelor, or perhaps stolen.
Item Two: Cheese Stix
Oh, how edgy. See, what we have here is the use of contemporary abbreviation for the purpose of sheer brevity. This list does not appear to be too hastily scribed, so why did our little shopper go to such antisocial lengths to save time? And what is she doing buying cheese stix anyway? Those are a one-way express ticket to pudgeville.
Item Three: Tuna
At least there is a sensible choice this early in the list. Perhaps the protein from the tuna will counteract the complete lack of nutrition from the rest of this depraved diet.

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